Dreams: "The classroom, and the grandmother's room."

Dream:

(Vienna, woman - age 28)

"I was in the university where the guy who I'm now seeing studies. I am sitting in his classroom near him. Strangely, the classroom from the dream is at the same time my grandmother's room. The room that I still remember very well from my childhood. I could always "hide" there when my parents had an argument at home. Suddenly the lecture stopped and the man came up to me. He was smiling but at the same time I could see that he was angry that I came to see him.

“Don’t you think I understand? The hopeless dream of being. Not seeming, but being. Conscious at every moment. Vigilant. At the same time, the chasm between what you are to others and to yourself. The feeling of vertigo and the constant desire to at last be exposed — to be seen through, cut down, perhaps even annihilated. Every tone of voice is a lie, every gesture a falsehood, every smile a grimace" - Ingmar Bergman - "Persona"

I could understand that he reacted that way, but I still felt bad as my intentions were good and I just wanted to see him and to make sure that he is doing alright. He asked me to leave. I didn't feel offended or anything like that. I just slowly packed my things and left the classroom. Suddenly, I found myself in a hospital corridor. In some sort of waiting lounge where I stood in front of a very strange couple. The man was much older than the girl, and they had an odd vibe, but they suited each other well at the same time as a couple. The girl said I could sit next to her but there was no chair or anything for me to sit on. I told her that I need to tidy up my backpack and fix my shoelaces. Then a nurse came to me, an older lady. She wanted to check my nails because they were painted silver and she accidentally took the paint off my right thumb. There was no pain or blood or anything like that, and I could easily put it down. I went back to the classroom to return some books from the backpack. The class was now empty and I found my grandmother's cupboard there. While unpacking, I found some books that I thought were interesting and decided to keep them inside my backpack. Next, I found myself at what looked like the reception from my elementary school and I met two of my friends who used to be a couple at the time I was going to that school. They split apart later in life and never came back together. It was nice to see them together in the dream. We chatted for a bit and I left the building. I noticed a person on the street who I thought was the guy from the beginning of the dream. I decided to walk beside him, but on the way I pretended I didn't know it was him and hoped he'd notice me and join me. He did but as he got closer to me I realised I wanted him but some random girl."

Dream interpretation:

The classroom reveals itself as a container of emotional charge which resonates with Vienna’s younger Self. Emotions that came to life in her dream are directly related to the relationship with the friend whom she visits, nevertheless these emotions simultaneously arouse the marks of her grandmother's room that she remembers from her childhood. A place that she associates with comfort and peace where she could find shelter when her parents had an argument. In the given context visit to the place where her friend studies may resemble a fear of rejection. The dreamer somehow feels that she invades her friend's ground; she becomes disappointed that the man speaks a language which she doesn't understand. At the end she is asked to leave, which she obeys. In that way she is taken out of her comfort zone i.e grandmother's room. To put it differently, the dreamer unconsciously associates the man from the dream with the shelter that she could find at her grandmother's place when she was a child. Yet, she is disappointed with what she receives in reality. In the second part of the dream, Vienna is in the hospital corridor, where she encounters a strange couple that in fact materialises emotions that represent parts of her own psyche. A complex created in the past and brought to life in the dream, for some reason calls for her attention in the present time. The couple in the dream invites her to join, but she replies that she needs to tidy up her backpack and make shoelaces. This manifests the dreamer's intention to break away from the complex they represent. The backpack symbolises an emotional baggage and the situation reveals that to move forward (fix the shoelaces) and break away from this subconscious struggle the dreamer needs to work something through (in the dream: tidy up the back pack). The nail polish represents the dreamer's Persona i.e how she wants to be perceived in reality. The silver colour that comes off her nail reveals that she may be tired of keeping the image of herself. Silver marks something pure, noble; an image she strives for but which is unable to stay on the surface of her fingernails. Returning to the classroom which is also her grandma's room, indicates a regression to the younger self. The book which she decides to keep in her backpack may be a reminder that, despite her great desire to break away from complexes brought back in the dream, she still intends to keep certain feelings from the past or perhaps is not yet ready to let go of something from the past. At the end, she leaves the building. Vienna decides to go along with a person whom she recognizes as the man who she visited in the first part. She hopes that she will be noticed and eventually the man will join her, but eventually she turns out to be totally mistaken, which may reveal a subconscious suggestion that she should take matters into her own hands rather than chase something that in fact does not exist.

Dreams: "behind the TV screen"

(Pascal, man - age 40)

Dream:

I am watching TV. It's late at night. I feel like I should be sleeping like everyone else, not sitting in front of the TV. The channel changes itself to some erotic movie with women in lingerie.

“Most men get their deepest conviction of self-worth from a woman, wife, mother, or if they are highly conscious, from their own anima. The woman sees and shows the man his value by lighting the lamp.” - Robert A. Johnson

I'm excited as if I'm watching something forbidden and at the same time I feel like it wasn't me who changed the channel so I'm relieved that I don't need to feel guilty. Suddenly, the door to the room opens and I see the same women from the TV screen now entering the room. There are a few of them and they are sexy, but at the same time there is a dark and disturbing atmosphere around them. I also noticed that they don't really look like humans, but more like figures cut out of a TV set, a bit like holograms, but flat. They slowly approach me while I feel aroused but somehow disturbed, when they touch me, it turns out that they try to rip off the skin from all over my body. I'm terrified and I want to scare them and I scream. I wake up screaming.

Dream interpretation:

The footage which Pascal sees on the the TV screen portrays sexual energy that is repressed from his consciousness; in the dream symbolically trapped behind the screen. The dream turns into a nightmare when the women somehow get into the room and attempt to literally rip the dreamer's skin off his body. Such a horrifying twist in a symbolic way resembles the mechanism of how these emotions symbolically “get under the dreamer's skin” (to get under someone's skin: to irritate or annoy someone) in the realms of his life. The dreamer recalls that the TV channel changed without his own intention, which may indicate a certain compulsiveness in his behavior over which he has no control.

Dreams: "Fall"

(Adrian - man, age 28)

Dream:

"I am with my father in our family home in the countryside. We moved there when I was about seven years old. It was the time when my parents decided to move out of the city. I don't have many good memories about this place. It was the time when their marriage started falling apart. My mother was an alcoholic and I think that moving out was meant to help but this never happened. In my dream my dad and I are both in the big room. This is how we called the large guest room where my parents spend most of their time. My dad looks very sick and weak in the dream, we talk and I tell him about a new project on which I was assigned to work. I want to show him the plans and photos I came up with, he seems to share my excitement despite the way he feels, he wants me to show him all the paperwork for my project...

"You never really learn much from hearing yourself speak.” - George Clooney

I keep everything in the small attic room. It was my room in the house and we used to call this room “a small room”. When I come inside to get the paperwork, I am surprised to find my mother there. She's very angry about something and starts arguing with me, I want to get my stuff and go back but she starts pushing. We argue for a while, I push her back and my mother's shirt tears to shreds. And it makes me feel ashamed, like I've done something wrong and want to run away and leave the room. Father approaches us in the corridor, but he is very sick, falls down, bangs his head on the hard floor and faints. His head looks very small and I am very afraid that he might have died. I lean over him and hold his head in my arms. I feel a lot of pity, regret and sadness."

Dream interpretation:

A new work project, as an achievement on the professional ground, relates with an effort to create a strong Ego. The feeling of satisfaction that the dreamer wants to share with his father reveals his subconscious longing for self-acceptance. On the other hand, his father's weakness and his exhaustion, points to what are in fact the dreamer's own emotions. An interesting way to interpret a dream is to look at its characters in it the same way as at the actors who are part of the same theatrical play. Such play taking place on the stages of one's imagination characterises his/her personality. Just the same as we are coming out from the theatre, the people we meet in our life, come out from such interactions (in a wider view even relationships) carrying a piece of the drama we carry hidden in ourselves. In the context of Adrian’s dream, the cast of the play includes his Ego cast as himself, and both of his parents in a roles of the psychic dynamics and complexes that for some reason are now coming to the spotlight. All characters are separate parts of one whole; his personality. In order to interpret a dream, it's important to understand it not only from the perspective of what we could call the dreaming Ego but also its depth.

R: Can you focus on your father for a moment, try to put yourself in his shoes and see if you can describe the way you feel or maybe think of something that you could have said?

A: Well, I feel very ill, weak and I'm tired, but I'm happy with my son, that is myself in my dream, I think I am proud of myself.

R: Why are you proud?

A: Because my son is doing well, I guess I just wish that my dad would see me doing well at work, I guess he would be proud if he was still alive.

R: Ok, what about the head, how does it feel to have such a small head?

A: I don't know. It must be weird… I feel like everything is compressed on the inside? I feel a lot of pressure. Like I have everything on my head and I can't handle it

R: Everything?

A: It’s weird but I thought about the Goomba’s characters from the Mario Bros game and that I am pathetic and just keep on running and doing pointless things.

R: Can you now imagine that it is you walking and falling to the floor, what happened there?

A: Well, I feel… ashamed. You know how when you are so powerless but at the same time so powerless that you don't even care if you are doing a scene and people are looking at you. Oh, and I also hate people feeling sorry for me… just like me in the dream where I felt so bad about my father. But if I were him, like you asked me to imagine, I would hate the feeling of weakness and the fact that people would feel pity for me. I don't like being seen as weak, I would rather have people dislike me if anything.

From the dreamer’s point of view his father “seems to share” his excitement, however when I encouraged him to embody his father character on it's own ground, the dreamer didn't mention anything related to his own achievement. The dreamer's father is weak and sick, and as a character describes what is in fact a present state of the dreamer's mind. He embodies an exhaustion accumulated in the dreamer's head, “Like I have everything on my head and I can't handle it” and as the dreamer further associates “I am pathetic and just keep on running and doing pointless things”. Perhaps the dreamer is unconsciously getting tired of making an effort to achieve that kind of an Ego that he could feel proud of himself, but at the same time he feels drained inside. He feels overwhelmed and he collapses to the ground in the end. The first part of the dream unveils the psychic dynamics that at some degree describe Adrian’s perception of reality. His willingness to comply, and a kind of paternal attitude towards others, despite exhaustion. It also exposes his fear of being seen as weak, which keeps him going despite exhaustion. A fear that paradoxically wears him out even more until he just can't walk any longer.

R: Can you now try to imagine that you step into your mothers shoes. Can you tell me how does that feel? Anything comes to your mind?

A: It was easier with my father I think but I feel a lot of anger, some envy or jealousy.

R: Why?

A: Perhaps that I got a promotion at work, and I don't know why, but I think I just want to ruin the moment?

R: So it is quite the opposite of what was seen in your father?

A: Yes, definitely. I have the impression that my mother doesn't wish me well and wants to humiliate me.

R: Ok, and you can imagine that you are her. Do you think of anything that might illustrate how or what she feels in this situation?

A: Well, she's angry, and I think she feels a bit rejected, maybe a bit misunderstood, I am not sure it's difficult for me to do that, it was easier when we tried with my father.

The dreamer's mother represents something that strongly demands his attention. A female instinct that is aggressive and uncontrollable. Adrian’s Ego is afraid of these emotions, he fears that it might reveal something that is under the image of his Persona and despite his effort to ruin that image. We could think of the small room, as the place that resonates with the dreamer's inner child and in that order the figure of his mother may symbolise something that he suppressed and that he is ashamed of. During this internal struggle, his mother's shirt tears, showing her nudity, that is symbolically, revealing what is hidden underneath the image of the dreamer's Persona. At this point Adrian feels frustration and the danger of being exposed and ashamed.